Go the Fuck to Sleep

Go the Fuck to Sleep

Colourfully illustrated and hilariously funny, this is a breath of fresh air for parents new, old and expectant.* *(You probably shouldn't read this to your children.)

Author: Adam Mansbach

Publisher: Canongate Books

ISBN: 9780857862662

Category: Humor

Page: 32

View: 676

Go the Fuck to Sleep is a bedtime book for parents who live in the real world, where a few snoozing kitties and cutesy rhymes don't always send a toddler sailing off to dreamland. Profane, affectionate and refreshingly honest, it captures the familiar and unspoken tribulations of putting your child to bed for the night. Colourfully illustrated and hilariously funny, this is a breath of fresh air for parents new, old and expectant.* *(You probably shouldn't read this to your children.)
Categories: Humor

The New York City Bartender s Joke Book

The New York City Bartender s Joke Book

He opens the engine cover, looks at the engine, goes back to his snowmobile,
gets some tools, and starts tinkering with the ... Much to her dismay, she hears
her son say, “42nd Street, anyone who wants to get on, get the fuck on, anyone
who ...

Author: Jimmy Pritchard

Publisher: Hachette UK

ISBN: 9780446551052

Category: Humor

Page: 300

View: 857

Jimmy Pritchard has been collecting jokes from diverse individuals during his career tending bars in New York. This collection includes more than 400 jokes that are sure to have anybody laughing.
Categories: Humor

Reasons to be Pretty

Reasons to be Pretty

always wanna say shit for me , vouch for me or sign shit that we should both have
our names on and I ' m not gonna have it ... Fuck off . . . that ' s what I want you to
do , Greg , get the fuck out of my life and leave me alone , let me start over in a ...

Author: Neil LaBute

Publisher: Dramatists Play Service Inc

ISBN: 0822223945

Category: Drama

Page: 63

View: 906

THE STORY: A love story about the impossibility of love, REASONS TO BE PRETTY introduces us to Greg, who really, truly adores his girlfriend, Steph. Unfortunately, he also thinks she has a few physical imperfections, and when he casually mentions t
Categories: Drama

What the fuck preserve Decluttering and minimalism

What the fuck preserve  Decluttering and minimalism

Between many useless things that you realize that you have accumulated so idiot
, you may find things that might be useful for other people or things still new to be
able to sell. Keep in mind that, give or sell something that you have been given ...

Author: Frank Diamante

Publisher: Youcanprint

ISBN: 9788892643390

Category: Self-Help

Page:

View: 161

The consumerist society there has "tamed" for good, in order to enable us to become the voracious consumers of unnecessary things, bulky and expensive. There fill of thousands of objects to fill a void which seems unbridgeable, as if it were normal accumulate in continuation every object that we see. If you are reading this book because you are sensitive to this issue and perhaps you feel even a little idiots when, in opening a cabinet or drawer, you may undertake to rummaging among thousands of objects to find what you need. Well, the councils bachelors expressed in this book may help to give you the motivation that you are missing to deliver you from your past spent to accumulate too many unnecessary things, sometimes also costly. Eliminating and selling unnecessary things, not only do you get more space in the house and a few bucks more in the pockets, but you will also obtain benefits from the psychological point of view, because you will start to buy only what you really want to; this will make you feel better and allow you to know even better your personality. The "decluttering", in a few words, consists in the stop spending money to fill with shit shiny.
Categories: Self-Help

The Low Road

The Low Road

They get in. The guy says in a surly, commanding voice: “We're going to fucking
Dorchester.” Followed by her saying” “And don'tfucking take us the fucking long
way.” “Get the fuck out!” I order. With fares like these you can't fucking win.

Author: Karl J. Stenstrom

Publisher: Xlibris Corporation

ISBN: 9781465374639

Category: Biography & Autobiography

Page: 233

View: 185

The Low Road is a memoir of the life and exploits of a twenty-something Boston City cab driver in the 70s and 80s. This gritty yet humorous story targets audiences of a wide spectrum. It is a must read for anyone who likes true crime, adventure, and a likable villain that triumphs over adversity, peppered with the seediness and debauchery of inner city life. The book places the reader in the shoes of a young man starting out in the world, alone, nave, and troubled. Having no marketable skills but his cleverness and cunning, he carves out a living in a major city. He takes hold of what is his only opportunity in life and becomes more adept as time goes on, finally becoming a master at the game that once had him pinned. Native Bostonians, college students, and anyone with a perverse and pessimistic sense of humor will enjoy reading The Low Road because it is a fast paced, comical, and factual story of a true underdog who finally overcame.
Categories: Biography & Autobiography

Contract

Contract

(The truth is: on Friday, which is normally when I come here, to this clanking
magnolia breeze-block on-hold life, I was sitting ... Friday was one day after I told
Sally to shut the fuck up, to get the fuck out of my flat, to get her sick fucking
religious ...

Author: Simon Spurrier

Publisher: Hachette UK

ISBN: 9780755388172

Category: Fiction

Page: 293

View: 231

Life becomes complicated when the dead won't stay dead, in this stunning debut by Simon Spurrier. Michael Point doesn't seem anything special. He dresses conservatively, is thoughtful, methodical and well spoken. He also happens to kill people for a living. It's not about getting back at the world; for Michael it's much simpler than that: It's All About The Money. But things are starting to get strange: his hits are coming back to life and trying to kill him. Is he losing his mind? Or is could it be that the things he sees aren't delusions at all, but hints of a divine conflict: a heavenly war, sucking him in...?
Categories: Fiction

Are You Fierce Focused Fabulous Or Just Another Dumb Bitch

Are You Fierce  Focused    Fabulous Or Just Another Dumb Bitch

I don't give a fuck if you have no money and or no place to go! I don't give a fuck if
you have no plan, because you DON'T NEED a plan to get the fuck away from
someone who is causing you bodily harm! You don't need an excuse, plan, ...

Author: Nadia Holliday

Publisher: Lulu.com

ISBN: 9780557512560

Category: Self-Help

Page: 66

View: 913

A Self-Improvement Guide written by a real woman for other real women.
Categories: Self-Help

House to House

House to House

The fuckers under the stairs find this hilarious. ... FUCK THEM. FUCK THESE
FAGGOTS. Listen to 'em fucking with us.” “Hey motherfucker, I don't give a shit
about them. ... He looks over at his guys and says, “We're going to get the fuck out
.

Author: David Bellavia

Publisher: Simon and Schuster

ISBN: 9781416571841

Category: Biography & Autobiography

Page: 336

View: 873

THE CLASSIC SOLDIER’S MEMOIR FROM MEDAL OF HONOR RECIPIENT STAFF SERGEANT DAVID BELLAVIA “A rare and gripping account of frontline combat.”—LTG (Ret.) H.R. McMaster, author of Dereliction of Duty “They used to say that the real war will never get in the books. Here it does, stunningly.” —Thomas E. Ricks, author of Fiasco: The American Military Adventure in Iraq and Making the Corps “To read this book is to know intimately the daily grind and danger of men at war.”—Anthony Swofford, New York Times bestselling author of Jarhead One of the great heroes of the Iraq War, Staff Sergeant David Bellavia captures the brutal action and raw intensity of leading his Third Platoon, Alpha Company, into a lethally choreographed kill zone: the booby-trapped, explosive-laden houses of Fallujah's militant insurgents. Bringing to searing life the terrifying intimacy of hand-to-hand infantry combat, this stunning war memoir features an indelibly drawn cast of characters, not all of whom would make it out alive, as well as the chilling account of the singular courage that earned Bellavia the Medal of Honor: Entering one house alone, he used every weapon at his disposal in the fight of his life against America's most implacable enemy. Bellavia has written an unforgettable story of triumph, tragedy, and the resilience of the human spirit.
Categories: Biography & Autobiography

Bob Knight

Bob Knight

What would have been corporal punishment anywhere else was just the way
things were at IU. ... throughout with more rage than the written word can convey,
Knight told them: IF YOU WANT TO PLAY, GET OUT, GET THE FUCK OUTA
HERE!

Author: Steve Delsohn

Publisher: Simon and Schuster

ISBN: 9780743462679

Category: Biography & Autobiography

Page: 335

View: 934

A portrait of the controversial basketball coach traces his tenure with Indiana University and offers insight into the darker side of his personality as well as the methods that led to his numerous awards.
Categories: Biography & Autobiography

The Pain Would Not Never Heal How Life Goes On

The Pain Would Not Never Heal  How Life Goes On

I hand out to stacy tweety bucks to get her some then. Shit I need to make some
money to re up, so I can get the fuck out of here. I knew thee dam, bms was mad
at me 'cause ii have somethin' they want back, man fuck them. Like I say to them ...

Author: April Graves

Publisher: Xlibris Corporation

ISBN: 1477167129

Category: Family & Relationships

Page: 79

View: 339

The pain will not never heal. Street life thug guy, how he decides to change his life from getting off the streets. Sold drugs and went to prison, did his time and decided to give up the game and change his life. J decided to give his life to God when he left and try to start over with his life. J had liked a girl from Racine, Wisconsin, back in them days, but they didnt make it cause April moved on. When J decided to change one day, J wrote a friend, and her name was April. She didnt know how to take it, but they made it to be. J was a happy guy, already had kids. When J got with April, J decided to make her the woman of his dreams. J made her to be his wife. Was in some mix up cause the haters will not let them go on with their love. One day J was a little stress; things were coming at J like someone was stepping on his toes and bring him down with all the madness. But they made it to be their love. April was a female from Chicago that let the bride be the beast. April made it in with joy and happiness.
Categories: Family & Relationships

The Weekend

The Weekend

If they get in here—” “If!? If! Bitch—you know they're going to get in! Why else
would you leave me the got damn gun?!” “—try to keep your aim straight. If all
else fails save the last bullet for yourself.” “Fuck you, bitch! You know I can't take
my ...

Author: Traci Hayden

Publisher: Xlibris Corporation

ISBN: 9781465371096

Category: Fiction

Page: 231

View: 250

Five average, middle-age friends take a girls-only weekend vacation together once a year. Leaving the traditional vacations behind for the first time, they decide to tackle camping and head for a beautiful park preserve in the Pennsylvania wilderness. On their first night, things take a turn for the worse when they encounter three mysterious mountain men who abduct them and bring them to their cabin with the intent to rape and torture them. Hell-bent on surviving and making it back to their loved ones, the women quickly cease to be victims and make unrelenting war on the men. Relying on instincts they never knew they possessed, the women resort to brutal and savage tactics, and soon turn the tide on their attackers.
Categories: Fiction

The Muthafucker How to Fuck Shit Up and Stuff A Novel

The Muthafucker   How to Fuck Shit Up and Stuff  A Novel

I had come across the PM quite by accident, whilst prowling a local library,
attempting to research how the fuck to break into Downing Street without getting
shot, caught or arrested. Dickhead O'Tool had been promoting a library scheme
that ...

Author: The Muthafucker

Publisher: Lulu.com

ISBN: 9781471663697

Category:

Page:

View: 389

Categories:

Bloodline Gypsy

Bloodline Gypsy

It was hideous, glaring in on him with animal eyes, the door wasn't locked. He
headed straight down the road, dragging the creature with him. “What the fuck . . .
what the fuck! Get off man!” he was screaming. The door started to openjust a slit.

Author: Shirley A. Martin

Publisher: AuthorHouse

ISBN: 9781481748698

Category: Fiction

Page: 412

View: 948

A supernatural thriller of chilling carnage and haunting beauty, Bloodline Gypsy unearths the origin of a mythical creature that has plagued history since the dark ages. Tracing an inherent line of magic back to Egypt in 981 AD, this dark fantasy reveals the mysterious link between gypsies and werewolves. A yoke that, twelve hundred years later, reveals itself in the form of a birthmark stamped on children born of Louvari descent. When Susannah Henika loses her mother in a tragic accident, she moves to a mountain resort town to live with a father she has never known. She soon falls victim to night terrors and an impending sense of dread. She meets a woman in the woods, Madalina Sadrinovic, whose uncanny ways set Susannah ill at ease. Strange and foreboding events follow the arrival of Madalina’s twin brother Luca. A local boy goes missing. The American teenager begins to suspect that somehow linked to the strange markings on her hand she may be one of the last remaining humans, genetically predestined to bear the offspring of an altered species her ancestor forged into the world.
Categories: Fiction

Motorcycle Ride on the Sea of Tranquility

Motorcycle Ride on the Sea of Tranquility

“Fucking gooks, man, get the fucking gooks outta here,” he was mumbling. He
had his arms wrapped around himself as if he would unravel if he loosened his
grip. I shivered. My thin blouse and shorts suddenly felt skimpy, made me feel ...

Author: Patricia Santana

Publisher: UNM Press

ISBN: 9780826324375

Category: Fiction

Page: 276

View: 366

It's April 1969, and fourteen-year-old Yolanda Sahagún can hardly wait to see her favorite brother, Chuy, newly returned from Vietnam. But when he arrives at the Welcome Home party the family has prepared in his honor it's clear that the war has changed him. The transformation of Chuy is only one of the challenges that Yolanda and the rest of her family face. This powerful coming-of-age novel, winner of the 1999 Chicano/Latino Literary Contest, is a touching and funny account of a summer that is still remembered as a crossroads in American life. Yolanda and her brothers and sisters learn how to be men and women and how to be Americans as well as Mexican Americans. "A captivating portrayal . . . .the novel is challenging, warm, provocative, often humorous, always engaging."--Rudolfo Anaya "Patricia Santana's Motorcycle Ride on the Sea of Tranquillity will take you on an exhilarating journey through the tortured landscape of the late 1960s, and show you how the stench of a brutal foreign war and revolutionary winds at home swept into the lives on one Mexican American family in Southern California. . . . Santana takes her place among those new Chicana writers who are refashioning the face of American literature for the twenty-first century."--Jorge Mariscal, University of California, San Diego, author of Aztlan and Viet Nam: Chicano and Chicana Experiences of the War
Categories: Fiction

Inside the Walls of the Projects

Inside the Walls of the Projects

I just wanted to make sure you OK, I laughed, Linda went on talking about how
Biggs would come up to the school and ... Biggs told James once again get the
fuck out his room, you know what, James as a matter of fact get the fuck out of my
 ...

Author: Tanischia Manley-Lumsden

Publisher: Booktango

ISBN: 9781468913088

Category: Fiction

Page:

View: 451

This book is about growing up in one of the notorious projects in East New York. Precious is trying to find a way out of the projects at any cost. She's in a abusive relationship with Biggs. Precious is afraid of Biggs into she meets Q'ron, one of the biggest drug dealers in East New York. Biggs got murder under suspicious circumstance. Q'ron also got shot and no one know's who comitting these crimes. Precious sister Toya is the head district attorney leading the case. will she stay loyal to her sister . Sex/Money/Murder/Drama
Categories: Fiction

All the Fireflies in France

All the Fireflies in France

The time has come to move on from it and holding on to him this way is selfish
and self destructive on your part, well at ... I do fucking get it and the facts about
the situation has registered very clearly in my brain even if! do not want to accept
the ...

Author: Heather Maria Ramirez

Publisher: Author House

ISBN: 9781481774420

Category: Fiction

Page: 312

View: 824

This writer does it all. Her new wine Drunk Poet is in the making, exotic flavors to pick from inspired by her books. This writer's new perfume line can be purchased at kimmymakescents.com. This new novel, All the Fireflies in France is a one of a kind love-story reader's are going to love written by what they are calling the people's Paperdoll. Heather continues splashing ink onto blank pages collecting the hearts of readers world wide. Her next book is already in the making titled, The Leonardo da Vinci Romance Story. Miss Ramirez is also a song writer in the process of entering the U.K. song writing contest. A quote from this writer known as the peoples Paperdoll. "I was born to write, this is my purpose. To live is to write, not to live is not to write. I shall die just as I have lived, as a poetic princess, a queen in the writer's world, as a lyrical writing goddess. I am the people's Paper-doll a title I had to earn. I used to be an unknown writer living as a starving artist, with a hunger to create. I had to keep writing until they read me out. I love my reader's and supporters, I write for them for meant to be reasons, because I am their Paper-doll."
Categories: Fiction

Trunk Space

Trunk Space

I was just getting ready to go to bed,” She responded uneasily. “You look good ...
Well, he doesn't normally come over here when he gets off work He's at the bar.
Why don't ... Why don't you just put on your gear and get the fuck out.” “Fuck that!

Author: Jackie Ricci

Publisher: Xlibris Corporation

ISBN: 9781469125602

Category: Biography & Autobiography

Page: 131

View: 339

TAKE A TRIP with a psychopath as he seeks revenge on friends and family who set him up and crossed him once they thought that he would be safely locked away in prison for a very long time. This book is based on an actual incident that took place in Atlantic City, New Jersey, back in June 2006. A very mentally unstable man, who was striving to maintain his sanity, was placed into a position where he felt forced to defend himself using deadly force. The woman closest to him sent people after him, to kill him, but they failed. Protecting himself got him over fifi ve long years in prison. Five years where a rage grew inside of him every second of each day. Throughout the incident and the length of the prison sentence, He is crossed by his family, friends, and the mothers of his children. All of them knew what type of animal they were dealing with, but they chose to cross him anyway. From the moment that He is released from prison, He begins seeking revenge on them all. His goal is not just to kill them. He wants to utterly destroy their lives and the lives of their loved ones. When someone this determined and demented is released back into society, with a grudge to settle, absolutely no one is safe; and He will prove it. Trunk Space is truly the most twisted tale ever told about what could happen when people mess with the wrong person. Take a journey into the mind of a lunatic and ride with him as He rights the wrongs that were done to him. Youll never expect what will happen next because even he is too sick and demented to know. Have you crossed the line lately with someone who is a little off? Hopefully not, or these events, or ones like it, could surely happen to you too. Feel His pain and His victims horror as He exacts his revenge.
Categories: Biography & Autobiography

Mirror Opposites

Mirror Opposites

Sorry Frank but I have to include you as well . . . There is no tea! This is not a
neighborhood! So just turn around and get the fuck out of here! DO IT NOW! AND
TAKE THIS FAT TUB OF SHIT WITH YOU!” he commands. Frank taken back by ...

Author: J L Daniels

Publisher: AuthorHouse

ISBN: 9781491871614

Category: Fiction

Page: 790

View: 323

The stock market crash October 19,1987 becomes a pivotal life-changing event for identical twins Tom and Glenn Lonardo. The fallout from this calamitous market collapse triggers actions and events that inexorably engulf the brothers, sucking them into a vortex called disaster. It is a tale of “cool” assassins, a unique Las Vegas casino with its enforcers, Wall Street players and pundits and beautiful women. It is replete with a host of unforgettably bizarre characters including a Jewish midget who is part Eskimo and a FBI agent who yodels, and a background true to life story of brothers brought up in contrasting cultures. It is a story of larceny, love and lust; greed and deceit; a fugitive on the run and murder! While it is suspenseful and has its unspeakably tragic twists and turns, it is highly entertaining and always amusing. It will keep a reader’s eyes open! A work of FICTION, it borrowed from much that was true.
Categories: Fiction

Freezing in Duval

Freezing in Duval

Before Kevin knew what hit him Claudette was punching and kicking him on the
back. Get off my mother fucking baby!!! get off my mother fucking baby!!said a
crying Claudette. Bitch get the fuck off my mother fucking back!!! I'm going to
count to ...

Author: Keith Nesbitt

Publisher: Xlibris Corporation

ISBN: 9781503525436

Category: Fiction

Page: 144

View: 782

This is the first of a trilogy based on the struggles of the game that most people dont know about and the cold-hearted streets of Duval County, Florida. With the trials and tribulations of Freeze, Slim, and Bat Man, will they win, or will they lose their chess match with the reaper? Will they make it out of the game, or will the reaper make the last move?
Categories: Fiction

Close

Close

He was a lairy fucker and he was getting harder and harder to control. 'No one
can get a fucking foot on the front line and that is what's giving me the fucking
hump. Spider and his brother have sewn it all up.' Dave sipped his coffee in
silence ...

Author: Martina Cole

Publisher: Hachette UK

ISBN: 9780755350674

Category: Fiction

Page: 672

View: 250

She'll do whatever it takes to keep them together... Hard-hitting and uncompromising, CLOSE by the 'undisputed queen of crime writing' (Guardian) and Sunday Times No.1 bestseller Martina Cole tells the story of a woman determined to protect her family from an increasingly dangerous world... Patrick Brodie knows exactly how far he's prepared to go to get what he wants. And he wants it all. Now. Before long, Patrick has become a legend in his own lifetime. Violently. Lily Diamond is different from the kind of woman Patrick is normally attracted to. But together they are determined that their children will have everything they didn't. Until the unthinkable happens and Lily is left on her own to look after their family in a dangerous world. The Brodies must stay close to survive. But as everyone knows, your sins will find you out. If you love powerful female characters, be sure to also read Martina Cole's GOODNIGHT LADY, THE KNOW and GET EVEN. These ladies are strong, resilient and vengeful...
Categories: Fiction