Chelsea Chelsea Bang Bang

Chelsea Chelsea Bang Bang

Who else would send all-staff emails to smoke out the dumbest people on her show? Now, in this new collection of original essays, the #1 bestselling author of Are You There, Vodka?

Author: Chelsea Handler

Publisher: Grand Central Publishing

ISBN: 0446552437

Category: Humor

Page: 256

View: 139

WHAT . . . A RIOT! Life doesn't get more hilarious than when Chelsea Handler takes aim with her irreverent wit. Who else would send all-staff emails to smoke out the dumbest people on her show? Now, in this new collection of original essays, the #1 bestselling author of Are You There, Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea delivers one laugh-out-loud moment after another as she sets her sights on the ridiculous side of childhood, adulthood, and daughterhood. Family moments are fair game, whether it's writing a report on Reaganomics to earn a Cabbage Patch doll, or teaching her father social graces by ordering him to stay indoors. It's open season on her love life, from playing a prank on her boyfriend (using a ravioli, a fake autopsy, and the Santa Monica pier) to adopting a dog so she can snuggle with someone who doesn't talk. And everyone better duck for cover when her beach vacation turns into matchmaking gone wild. Outrageously funny and deliciously wicked, CHELSEA CHELSEA BANG BANG is good good good good! CHELSEA HANDLER ON... Being unpopular: "My parents couldn't have been more unreasonable when it came to fads or clothes that weren't purchased at a pharmacy." Living with her boyfriend: "He's similar to a large toddler, the only difference being he doesn't cry when he wakes up." Appreciating her brother: "He's a certified public accountant, and I have a real life." Arm-wrestling a maid of honor: "It wasn't her strength that intimidated me. It was the starry way her eyes focused on me, like Mike Tyson getting ready to feed."
Categories: Humor

Chelsea Chelsea Bang Bang

Chelsea Chelsea Bang Bang

... Asshole Chapter Nine: The Suspect Chapter Ten: Chunk Chapter Eleven: Deep Thoughts by Chelsea Handy Acknowledgments Other Books Starring Chelsea Handler Copyright OTHER BOOKS STARRING CHELSEA HANDLER Lies Chelsea Handler Told Me.

Author: Chelsea Handler

Publisher: Hachette UK

ISBN: 9780446563536

Category: Humor

Page: 135

View: 222

In these personal essays, the hilarious comedian and Chelsea Lately host reflects on family, love life, and the absurdities of adulthood with "cheeky candor" and signature wit (Philadelphia Inquirer). Life doesn't get more hilarious than when Chelsea Handler takes aim with her irreverent wit. Who else would send all-staff emails to smoke out the dumbest people on her show? Now, in this new collection of original essays, the #1 bestselling author of Are You There, Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea delivers one laugh-out-loud moment after another as she sets her sights on the ridiculous side of childhood, adulthood, and daughterhood. Family moments are fair game, whether it's writing a report on Reaganomics to earn a Cabbage Patch doll, or teaching her father social graces by ordering him to stay indoors. It's open season on her love life, from playing a prank on her boyfriend (using a ravioli, a fake autopsy, and the Santa Monica pier) to adopting a dog so she can snuggle with someone who doesn't talk. And everyone better duck for cover when her beach vacation turns into matchmaking gone wild. Outrageously funny and deliciously wicked, Chelsea Chelsea Bang Bang is good good good good! Chelsea Handler on . . . Being unpopular: "My parents couldn't have been more unreasonable when it came to fads or clothes that weren't purchased at a pharmacy." Living with her boyfriend: "He's similar to a large toddler, the only difference being he doesn't cry when he wakes up." Appreciating her brother: "He's a certified public accountant, and I have a real life." Arm-wrestling a maid of honor: "It wasn't her strength that intimidated me. It was the starry way her eyes focused on me, like Mike Tyson getting ready to feed."
Categories: Humor

Lies That Chelsea Handler Told Me

Lies That Chelsea Handler Told Me

Friends, family, co-workers--they've all been tricked by Chelsea into believing stories of total foolishness and into behaving like total fools. Luckily, they've lived to tell the tales and, for the very first time, write about them.

Author: Chelsea's Family, Friends, and Other Victims

Publisher: Hachette UK

ISBN: 9781455504657

Category: Humor

Page: 304

View: 836

A hilarious #1 bestselling collection of essays from those nearest and dearest to comedian Chelsea Handler--the people she's lied to. "My tendency to make up stories and lie compulsively for the sake of my own amusement takes up a good portion of my day and provides me with a peace of mind not easily attainable in this economic climate." -- Chelsea Handler, from Chapter 10 of Chelsea Chelsea Bang Bang It's no lie: Chelsea Handler loves to smoke out "dumbassness," the condition people suffer from that allows them to fall prey to her brand of complete and utter nonsense. Friends, family, co-workers--they've all been tricked by Chelsea into believing stories of total foolishness and into behaving like total fools. Luckily, they've lived to tell the tales and, for the very first time, write about them.
Categories: Humor

Drinking with My Dog

Drinking with My Dog

He also appeared on the cover of Handler's saucy autobiographical essay book Chelsea Chelsea Bang Bang. When he and Tammy, Chelsea's other rescue dog at that time, passed away, Handler vowed to adopt more dogs from shelters as soon as ...

Author: Natalie Bovis

Publisher: Hachette UK

ISBN: 9780762480234

Category: Cooking

Page: 216

View: 134

Bestselling author, award-winning mixologist, and passionate animal advocate Natalie Bovis pairs fascinating doggie trivia with easy-to-make drink recipes in this unique cocktail book for dog lovers. If there's one thing we know, it's that we can survive anything with a furry companion and a cocktail by our side. Enter Drinking with My Dog, which combines our devotion to dogs with celebratory drinks in this charming, pet-centric cocktail book from Natalie Bovis of The Liquid Muse. Inside you’ll find everything you need to know to set up your home bar and mix 60+ delicious cocktails organized into dog-themed chapters, featuring rescue dogs, famous furbabies, wild dogs, cocktails for pawlidays throughout the year, and more. Also included is canine history, whimsical illustrations, and toast-worthy quotes. Drinking with My Dog is the ideal companion for dog lovers and drink enthusiasts alike, and is the cocktail book we’ve always needed to help us raise a glass to wo/man’s best friend!
Categories: Cooking

Life Will Be the Death of Me

Life Will Be the Death of Me

In the wake of President Donald Trump’s election, feeling that her country—her life—has become unrecognizable, Chelsea Handler has an awakening.

Author: Chelsea Handler

Publisher: Dial Press

ISBN: 9780525511786

Category: Biography & Autobiography

Page: 272

View: 298

#1 NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER • The funny, sad, super-honest, all-true story of Chelsea Handler’s year of self-discovery—featuring a nerdily brilliant psychiatrist, a shaman, four Chow Chows, some well-placed security cameras, various family members (living and departed), friends, assistants, and a lot of edibles A SKIMM READS PICK • “This will be one of your favorite books of all time.”—Amy Schumer In a haze of vape smoke on a rare windy night in L.A. in the fall of 2016, Chelsea Handler daydreams about what life will be like with a woman in the White House. And then Donald Trump happens. In a torpor of despair, she decides that she’s had enough of the privileged bubble she’s lived in—a bubble within a bubble—and that it’s time to make some changes, both in her personal life and in the world at large. At home, she embarks on a year of self-sufficiency—learning how to work the remote, how to pick up dog shit, where to find the toaster. She meets her match in an earnest, brainy psychiatrist and enters into therapy, prepared to do the heavy lifting required to look within and make sense of a childhood marked by love and loss and to figure out why people are afraid of her. She becomes politically active—finding her voice as an advocate for change, having difficult conversations, and energizing her base. In the process, she develops a healthy fixation on Special Counsel Robert Mueller and, through unflinching self-reflection and psychological excavation, unearths some glittering truths that light up the road ahead. Thrillingly honest, insightful, and deeply, darkly funny, Chelsea Handler’s memoir keeps readers laughing, even as it inspires us to look within and ask ourselves what really matters in our own lives. Praise for Life Will Be the Death of Me “You thought you knew Chelsea Handler—and she thought she knew herself—but in her new book, she discovers that true progress lies in the direction we haven’t been.”—Gloria Steinem “I always wondered what it would be like to watch Chelsea Handler in session with her therapist. Now I know.”—Ellen DeGeneres “I love this book not just because it made me laugh or because I learned that I feel the same way about certain people in politics as Chelsea does. I love this book because I feel like I finally really got to know Chelsea Handler after all these years. Thank you for sharing, Chelsea!”—Tiffany Haddish
Categories: Biography & Autobiography

You re Nose Is in My Crotch and Other Things You Shouldn t Know about Chelsea Chelsea Bang Bang

You re Nose Is in My Crotch  and Other Things You Shouldn t Know about Chelsea Chelsea Bang Bang

In this book, we have hand-picked the most sophisticated, unanticipated, absorbing (if not at times crackpot!), original and musing book reviews of "Chelsea Chelsea Bang Bang.

Author: Oliver Brock

Publisher: Lennex

ISBN: 5458983823

Category:

Page: 44

View: 816

In this book, we have hand-picked the most sophisticated, unanticipated, absorbing (if not at times crackpot!), original and musing book reviews of "Chelsea Chelsea Bang Bang." Don't say we didn't warn you: these reviews are known to shock with their unconventionality or intimacy. Some may be startled by their biting sincerity; others may be spellbound by their unbridled flights of fantasy. Don't buy this book if: 1. You don't have nerves of steel. 2. You expect to get pregnant in the next five minutes. 3. You've heard it all.
Categories:

Uganda Be Kidding Me

Uganda Be Kidding Me

Now, in this uproarious collection, she sneaks her sharp wit through airport security and delivers her most absurd and hilarious stories ever. On safari in Africa, it's anyone's guess as to what's more dangerous: the wildlife or Chelsea.

Author: Chelsea Handler

Publisher: Grand Central Publishing

ISBN: 1455599719

Category: Humor

Page: 272

View: 516

Wherever Chelsea Handler travels, one thing is certain: she always ends up in the land of the ridiculous. Now, in this uproarious collection, she sneaks her sharp wit through airport security and delivers her most absurd and hilarious stories ever. On safari in Africa, it's anyone's guess as to what's more dangerous: the wildlife or Chelsea. But whether she's fumbling the seduction of a guide by not knowing where tigers live (Asia, duh) or wearing a bathrobe into the bush because her clothes stopped fitting seven margaritas ago, she's always game for the next misadventure. The situation gets down and dirty as she defiles a kayak in the Bahamas, and outright sweaty as she escapes from a German hospital on crutches. When things get truly scary, like finding herself stuck next to a passenger with bad breath, she knows she can rely on her family to make matters even worse. Thank goodness she has the devoted Chunk by her side-except for the time she loses him in Telluride. Complete with answers to the most frequently asked traveler's questions, hot travel trips, and travel etiquette, none of which should be believed, UGANDA BE KIDDING ME has Chelsea taking on the world, one laugh-out-loud incident at a time.
Categories: Humor

My Horizontal Life

My Horizontal Life

The author shares a collection of true-life stories about her romps through the bedrooms of a variety of suitors, documenting her brief encounters with a Vegas stripper, a well-endowed little person, and a cruise ship performer.

Author: Chelsea Handler

Publisher: Bloomsbury Publishing USA

ISBN: 9781582346182

Category: Biography & Autobiography

Page: 226

View: 240

The author shares a collection of true-life stories about her romps through the bedrooms of a variety of suitors, documenting her brief encounters with a Vegas stripper, a well-endowed little person, and a cruise ship performer.
Categories: Biography & Autobiography

Are You There Vodka It s Me Chelsea

Are You There  Vodka  It s Me  Chelsea

The comedienne star of the Chelsea Handler Show describes her experiences with misbegotten boyfriends, her eccentric mixed-religion parents and the working world, a lifetime marked by numerous inebriated misadventures.

Author: Chelsea Handler

Publisher: Simon and Schuster

ISBN: 9781416596363

Category: Biography & Autobiography

Page: 274

View: 656

The comedienne star of the Chelsea Handler Show describes her experiences with misbegotten boyfriends, her eccentric mixed-religion parents and the working world, a lifetime marked by numerous inebriated misadventures. Reprint. A #1 best-seller.
Categories: Biography & Autobiography

A Bibliography of the State of Maine from the Earliest Period to 1891

A Bibliography of the State of Maine from the Earliest Period to 1891

( Communicated by J. F. Pratt , M. D. Chelsea . ) Bang . H. M. 2 : 103. ( 1886. ) [ 8252 1789. From what was incorporated into the town of Prospect . Feb. 24 , 1794. Communicated by John F. Pratt , of Chelsea , Mass . Bang .

Author: Joseph Williamson

Publisher:

ISBN: HARVARD:32044105247605

Category: Maine

Page: 684

View: 654

Categories: Maine